Monday, January 19, 2015

It's been 2 1/2 weeks ...

Time really does fly by. I honestly can not believe I have been home for over 2 weeks now. It's crazy to think that less than a month ago, I was a missionary and now I'm not.

But getting back into school has helped so much! I literally "jumped back into the swing of things". I spent 5 days in Texas with my family and friends there, then headed back to Utah State for School. It was hard saying good-bye to my family again, but knowing that they are now just a phone call or text message away really helps out.

The past 2 weeks have been full of emotions non-stop. I'll start with coming home:

Tuesday December 30, 2014 -- Sister Steinagel and I finished packing up our apartment. Never to be inhabited by sisters again (well as far as we know). It was sad to see the area be closed and really hard, but I know the Lord has a plan! Sister Freeman took us down to transfers and we were able to stop at Cook Out :) Cook Out is a restaurant in the East. I was able to get one last Cook Out Shake (what they are famous for), Banana Pineapple :) Yum!! Once we got to transfers it was so surreal. I sat on the stand, but I swear I was just sitting with the new missionaries yesterday. As I talked with the other missionaries going home, we all swore it had not been 18 months or 2 years since we had gotten off the plane in North Carolina. But it had. It has.

All us departing missionaries went to the mission home for a fireside with President and Sister Craven. It was a wonderful experience and I am excited to continue my mission forever!

The next day, New Years Eve, we went to the airport (way too early I might add). Said good-bye to President and Sister Craven and also some other missionaries who had different flights. I flew to Atlanta with a group of 20 or so missionaries. It was good to have them there and also to eat lunch one last time together. Their plane to Utah left 2 hours before my plane to Texas left, so I said good-bye and went to my terminal.

I think that's when it really started to hit me. I was alone. I was going to be released that night. I was no longer going to be a missionary. I tried to talk to some people sitting next to me, but every time I tried to bring up that I was going home, or had just been on a mission, I got choked up and couldn't continue. I felt lost in a sea of people, Not knowing who my companion was. It was a terrible feeling. But as I read over my notes and journal entries, I got courage. I could do this.

I landed in Austin around 6pm. It was so surreal seeing my family at the airport. AND my mom wasn't even with them! She went to go talk to someone else :P But I forgave her and still gave her the first hug.

I also had a surprise waiting for me at the airport. My (now) Boyfriend was there. I had no idea he was coming (although I had my suspicions). When I first saw him (across the carousel with the luggage on it) I turned around and started walking back. I had already spend at least the last 3 hours crying and I just couldn't deal with my emotions anymore. I was ecstatic that he had come. But at the same time I just couldn't deal with it at that moment. After talking to my mom for a moment, I said hi to him, but might have made him feel bad because I didn't talk or really pay attention to him for a couple hours...

My parents took me straight to the Stake Center and I met with the Stake President. There wasn't anything really special about it. I got my release letter and took of my name tag. It really didn't hit me until I got up the next morning and looked in the mirror. I could never wear that name tag again. It hit me hard. And it still does today. At least once a day I'll look in the mirror and think something is missing, but it's not.

My parents threw a New Years Eve/Mom's Birthday/Miriah's Homecoming Party that night. Everything from that night still feels like a dream though.

On Monday Jan 5, 2015 I flew to Utah. It was hard saying Good-bye to Texas again. I was sad, but I'm glad I could jump into things at school.

My mission was the best thing that could prepare me for the rest of my life. I know it won't be the best thing in the world that I will experience, but nothing could have prepared me better for where I am and where I am going than my mission to the North Carolina Charlotte Mission of Miracles! I loved every second of it! The good, the bad, and the ugly. The miracles that happened everyday. And the wonderful people I got to serve.

Sister (Miriah) Loosle

P.S. I mostly had to post this because now I have 100 posts :)